What I had expected

I had expected nothing and I have expected it all. I did my best to live my moments here as pleasant as I could but I do have several things I would do in a different way. Hmm, maybe that sounds a little too rough. What I really mean is there are some things which I would have done but time did not permit it. Come on, tell me how an asshole I am for saying what I just said: I did have 4 months at my disposal but 4 months are not an eternity.

The Internship

This was the reason I came back to Bucharest. Going back home for the internship was something which I simply had to do as there was no way of sustaining myself financially in Aarhus. I had my internship at Eau de Web and this internship might have been (more than a tad) lifechanging. The expectations I have had in regards to the internship were not fulfilled and I am more than happy for this outcome: I simply realized web programming is not something I should completely focus on. I also want to give huge thanks (and hugs) to all the people at the company for the way they treated me and their cooperation. I know I can sometimes(often..) be a very-hard-to-cope-with person but they adopted me fast and I am glad to say I have made some very good friends over there. Whenever I will get the chance, I will most definitely pay them a visit after their work schedule to grab a beer/juice and have a talk.

My Friends

I have made some acquaintances and have lost some friends but let’s face it, if one loses a friend, that was not a friend in the first place so he didn’t lose anything. As a genious once said, shit happens and there is nothing we can do about it.

Miscellaneous

I saw a lot of movies at the cinema (Please, for Christ’s sake, don’t make me list them all…) but the last one was the one that left a mark on me: Alice in Wonderland. The mark it left was not due to the movie itself but to the place I saw the movie: the Samsung IMAX in a Romanian Mall. Having a 25 metres by 18 metres screen, it was the best 3D experience I have ever had at a movie. There was a downside however since it can’t all be perfect: the subtitle was 2D and although I don’t need subtitles in order to watch a movie, once you have them on the screen, your eyes are used to move and read. No, you can’t read a 2D subtitle with the 3D glasses if that’s what you are asking. My eyes still hurt after this experience…
Oh, did I mention I have to wear glasses? Yeah, I went to an eye doctor and it seems I have to get myself a pair of lenses/glasses with the following attributes: -0.5 for one eye and -0.75 for the other. Therefore, if you see me on the street, wave to me and I ignore you, try yelling.. you might be more successfull

Pool

I played a lot of pool. And when I say a lot, I actually mean A HELL OF A LOT! In Victorian terms, that’s equal to a number close to 200 games in 4 months. My best score was on the week before now when my friend started the game, didn’t pot any ball, it was my turn and I potted all my 8 balls in the same series of shots, making this my best achievement so far. Wish I had a place to play some good pool in Aarhus (yeah, the price is also important).

Epilogue

That’s about it. I’ll probably just post this article as soon as I get home and now I’ll finish my battery playing some Dirt2 or something. I forgot to put my headphones in the hand luggage and I can’t watch CSI: NY Things are worse though: I forgot both my toothbrushes back home (the one I have at my home and the one at my girlfriend’s place). Guess I’ll buy one more and make this a premiere: having 3 toothbrushes and yellow teeth at the same time. Hurray!

So, now that I am confident that you guys understood what life is like (fuck, if that doesn’t help you, just make a comparison between this picture and this other picture), you can read the other bla bla that I am going to post around here like:

• I’ll be in Romania between the 28th of January and the 13th of May, doing my internship at an awesome company (I might try to make a trip for a Hypocrisy concert in either Vienna or Sofia)
• Advanced Photoshop Techniques that you may not be aware of
• Thousands of Photoshop Brush Collections
• Got a 10 at the 3rd semester project exam and I’m waiting for the 3rd semester subject exam (it’s either I get a 2 or a 12, depending on which subject I draw from the hat)
• I miss my girl.
• I’m just waiting for things to go on their usual downward path. I literally know that I am at the peak of the quality of my life so that’s why I ain’t so happy about it. I am usually an optimistic dude but you have to know where you stand and not get over excited.

And to my few readers: I’m sorry for the lack of posts in the recent time. Meh, there’s no particular reason for that: I still care about the 2 of you, it’s just that I realized that this blog doesn’t help me improve my personal life nor my professional life and I assigned it a smaller number in the huge queue of my priority list.

I did not get to meet with everyone whom I wanted to and I fully apologize for that! I sincerely hope we will get a chance to get together sometime between February and May. I did not get to see some people as much as I wanted to, as well. It made me feel like shit.

I also feel sick. Don’t know exactly what’s wrong with me but God damn, I hope I will manage to fix myself. It just ain’t right to feel like this and it gets me worried as hell.

And yeah, leaving Romania hurts like shit. I so wish I could combine 80% of the Danish life I’ve been spending for the last year and a half with the 20% that I am still interested over here. And yeah, I fell for HER! Sue me!

I had fun, I made fun, I smiled and made people smile. I continued my quest for the unseen glory and lived my life to the fullest the entire year which could actually make this the first year I did that.

I traveled a lot. And I mean, a lot, at least for my own tiny standards: I’ve been in shitloads of countries and unfortunately I did not get the chance to get more out of them.

What stresses me a lot is this humongous question: “When the hell did 2009 pass?!” Looking back to these 364 days, memories cross my mind from all directions and with no purpose what so ever! I swear, I am going to try to calm down, settle on a point of view and then I’ll have another attempt of a late review of 2009…

Meanwhile, Bon Jovi’s lyrics are stuck in my head and they don’t have any plans to leave: “I don’t know where I’m going, only God knows where I’ve been” and yes, this is a valid argument for all the aspects of my life: geographical, professional, personal and whatever other aspect there might be.

See you guys in 2010. I don’t know about you but if things are going on the same upward stream, this might just be the year I will do something amazing!

However, whatever you miss, let’s try to make you feel better, shall we? First of all, don’t get a cold heart thinking about the past. Whatever was and happened, just did and you should be happy for that. Who knows how much shittier your life might have been if you hadn’t encountered that person or situation. Second, keep in mind that humans work by the following principle: You only realize how valuable something/someone is to you until the moment you are actually faced with losing it/him/her. No, no matter what you had done, you couldn’t have made everything better.

As someone told me a few months ago, whatever is supposed to happen will happen no matter what. Therefore, stop crying your heart out for something that will never be the same again unless you invent a time machine. Kitty once shared a link on her blog with a beautiful article on this topic and a phrase got stuck in mind ever since: “You can go back to people and places but you can never go back to the exact circumstances”. That sentence is valid for absolutely any situation that I have encountered in my life and it has actually helped me get over.. something.

Therefore, guys, smile. I know it’s hard to concentrate and to lose the subjective approach towards life but just keep in mind that “it will all be ok in the end. If it’s not ok, it’s not the end” (© DeeDee).

I don’t know about you guys, but this is how it goes out for me: I make a mistake, I suffer the consequences, I transfer my point of view from subjective to objective, promise myself that I will take care from that point on, time passes by and I’m back to square one, forgetting about the mistake I had done and I attempt to take another shot at the same action, hoping for a miracle. It never happens though.

Whenever you lose someone you care about forever (as in passing away), you promise yourself that from that day on, you will always show the people you care about just how much you love them. And you do that, for a while. You actually are a better person who shows his affection the way he should have always done. But then… You forget. You forget how it all started, forget to talk the nice way you used to talk, forget to notice all the signs that you should notice and all you are left with are the regrets. Regrets that maybe somehow, someway, you could have done something about it.

I know I have said that life is funny or boring but I love life. I love breathing, eating, drinking, loving and struggling to wake up in the morning to go to school. My love towards life is tending to be on a downward path for the past year though. Don’t receive that sentence as a suicidal one ffs, I’m just saying that being alone is not really something that you should be looking for in this life.

Perceive this any way you want: Value the people you love, cherish the ones that love you and don’t miss any day of your life cause.. well, you know.. life’s too short to spend it alone.

Note: no, noone died, I didn’t lose anyone, no break-up, no fights with friends or anything what-so-ever. Just midnight thoughts.

The work isn’t hard but tomorrow might be my last day there since the school is just around the weekend. Ha, that sounds funny. Riiiiiiiiight.

Have I ever told you about that time when I was..

Nah, sorry, my mind is blank and there is absolutely nothing else I can tell you guys/gals other that I have to wake up at 5 o’clock tomorrow morning in order to go to work and gain the last third of the money I need for the plane ticket. The plane ticket will be from Copenhagen to Bucharest sometime this autumn (most likely sometimes in October since I don’t want a Sweet November or a Sometimes in April). I’ve got some urgent matters which I left hanging around among which I can count the cavities which need urgent fix otherwise I will find my self in the unpleasant circumstance of paying a humangous amount of money to the Danish dentist.

On the other hand, I find myself in a huge dillema which is going to get even bigger once the school year starts, that’s for sure.